Sunday, January 20, 2008

Romance 101

Bombarded by thoughts of chocolate covered strawberries, love letters tucked under my pillow, and tiny boxes of bling. Suck-er. That's me. I am a total victim of the glossy magazine ads and the TV commercials with the music leading up to the guy presenting a big 'ole bauble. Swoon. I want it.

I read a lot of trashy romance novels at a rather young age - which leads me to ask "what was my mom thinking?!" I've waited for my sullen pirate to ravish me, only to turn out to be the handsome and rich and attentive prince... sigh. You know the rest of that fairy tale!

I've had some near-misses with that kind of passion. Heck, I spent a decade chasing it.

My high school boyfriend - and first love - set the standard pretty high - heartfelt letters that are still tied in ribbons along with carefully pressed flowers, candle lit dinners and sincere promises for a remarkable future made with tears and a tiny diamond ring. I was 17 and thought that was the norm. He is the one that got away, only because I sent him away. And, as you may expect he went on to have that life without me. He offered to be the prince without all the agony and hype - surely that wasn't real.

My wedding at 18 years old (what was I thinking?) was complete with
a sense of doom and disaster, and many people crying real tears, surely he was my pirate. Actually he was a cad. At the very least. And I'm sure his 4th wife agrees.

I've had candle lit dinners at sunset overlooking spectacular views, a limo drive to a country inn (now that would've been nice, had that guy not got carsick!), many boxes of lingerie with satin bows, dozens & dozens of pink roses and teddy bears delivered to my office, romantic walks under the stars and on beaches, evenings with firelight and snow falls, promises and offers... all made by men whom for whatever reason, were all hype and no substance. You know the ones that fizzle out like they had a 3 month expiration date?

My husband and I have been together for almost 12 years, married for almost 10. He's not a romantic guy. His cards have always been humorous and, more than likely, have some thought of sex in there too, lest I forget about it. He hasn't whisked me away for many romantic dinners, and flowers are usually given with a sheepish apology. He's safely off the hook at buying cards as he can send the girls to the craft room and bribe them to make me something that will melt my heart (and he's right). His gifts for me are rather sensible, and sometimes funny - Lane Bryant "rock star" undies for Christmas.

So, I'm left with my own romantic thoughts - of my husband who lets me sleep while he leaves for work, and to awaken to the waiting pot of coffee. A man who goes to work everyday, without fail or excuse. It doesn't seem like much, but back in the day, I dated a few men who had too much money handed to them and not enough ambition to get their own real lives. My husband is not my pirate, nor my prince. Ours isn't a story they'll write books about, but there's something to be said for a comfortable & secure life. I bought him Sarris' chocolate and the four of us will be having a nice dinner in the dining room, maybe candlelight because the DDs will be thrilled and amazed. He's bringing them flowers. Now that melts my heart.

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